[ES!!] As I Am
[The Other Side of the Goal] Tetora Nagumo
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Tetora receives news from the producer that his Feature Live will be held soon. He ponders once more about what sort of live show he wants to make…
Story Release Date: August 10, 2023
Chapter 1
Season: Winter
Mm~, mm~…
Oh, ohh…? Why’re you staring at your phone? It’s really unusual for you to not gobble up tasty food as soon as you can, Tetsu-kun.
Isn’t galbi the meal of the day today, after it beautifully returned in response to your passionate love call?
You kept requesting the school cafeteria to bring it back ‘cause you so badly wanted to eat it again, so I thought you’d be super happy to see it again…?
‘Course I’m happy to see it back! I was grieving for so long after it disappeared from the menu, like, why would they even do that!?
So I’m super happy to see the galbi lunch meal resurface again!
I really am, but… Mm~…
Uh-oh, he’s back to going in deep thought.
Hellooo~? Your food’s gonna get cold at this rate. If you don’t want it, I’ll have it for myself~
Owah!? This is my galbi!
Without the galbi, I’ll just be having rice for lunch! So please don’t!
Tch~… I was hoping I’d get to have an extra serving for lunch… What a shame.
Anyway, jokes aside… What’s weighing on your mind so much that you’d ignore your beloved galbi lunch meal?
…Truth is, Anzu-anego messaged me saying my Feature Live has been decided.
Oh~! That’s great news!
Now I get it. That’s why you were staring at your phone without taking a single bite, huh?
So what you’ve been thinking about has something to do with the Feature Live as well, right?
You got it. The Feature Live is a solo performance, right?
So I thought about it all over again… What sorta live would I wanna do as I am now?
Ohh~ But I didn’t expect that you’d be worried over stuff like that.
‘Cause I thought, well, if this were the usual Tetsu-kun, he’d immediately say something like, “I want it to be a live show made for a man among men! Ossu!”
Oh, but, you’re also surprisingly delicate, aren’tcha~ Like, if you tripped over a pebble, you’d think over every possibility why that happened, yeah?
…Man, don’t bring up an example that actually sounds like something I’d do.
At first, I also thought ‘bout making a “man among men” live show, just like you mentioned, y’know?
But then I started thinking again ‘bout what it really means to be a “man among men”, and I’m not so sure anymore…
Like, remember when it was time for my personalized outfit?1
At first, all I said is that I don’t really have any particular desires except a cool-looking outfit, right?
Ah~ Yeah, you did say something like that~
In retrospect, the fact that you said you wanted a manly outfit, but then answered that you didn’t really have anything you particularly wanted was pretty unmanly, huh.
Guh…!?
It’s like when you ask “What would you like for dinner?” and only get “anything’s good” as a response. It’s the hardest to work with.
It would’ve been much more like a man among men to confidently say “meat!” right there and then~♪
You’re going off-topic here, Hinata-kun!
Ahaha, sorry, sorry. But you get what I mean, right?
…Well, I can’t say I don’t.
But even today, I was debating between galbi, pork fried with ginger, or pork cutlet for lunch, so it’s too painfully true…
Uu… I’m seriously so pathetic! I’m not manly at all!
Woah— I just brought up the topic as a light joke, but it’s causing a wildfire!?
C-C’mon now, Tetsu-kun, calm down.
Deciding what to eat for lunch and deciding what to do for a live show have different levels of importance. So it’s no surprise you’d be worried over your Feature Live, y’know?
Plus, after the first answer you gave for your personalized outfit, you were then able to figure out what you wanted to do deep down, and conveyed all your requests to Anzu-san just fine, right?
Yeah, you really helped me out a bunch for that, Hinata-kun. I really appreciated it.
…I still don’t think my answer to her back then was wrong.
My ideal vision of myself — My cool self is still “the me that works hard and continues to grow stronger” to this day.
But if that’s the answer I go with now, wouldn’t it just be the same thing as before? Wouldn’t I be contradicting myself if I say I want that as my live show?
Contradicting yourself where…?
Well, just think ‘bout it. I said that I wanna keep growing stronger, yet my answer is once again the same thing. Can you really say that I’ve grown, in that case?
Ah~ I think I get what you’re trying to say.
In other words, if there isn’t something that’s changed since then, then it just seems as though you haven’t grown, right?
But I feel like you shouldn’t change the “works hard and continues to grow stronger” part of you so easily, Tetsu-kun.
If that changes, I feel like it wouldn’t be you anymore, but something else entirely.
Yeah! Exactly that. It’s ‘cuz I don’t wanna move away from that part of myself that I’m struggling so much.
Not to mention, I still need to think ‘bout how to approach the pamphlet, so I’m real stuck…
Then wanna do that again?
We could get everyone’s help, like, “a meeting to think about Tetsu-kun’s Feature Live!”
Mm~ While I’d like to ask others for help on this, for now, I’ll think ‘bout it on my own.
We can put our heads together to brainstorm after I decide what sorta live show I wanna go with.
I feel like I have to decide on what my ideal is first, y’know?
…Alright. I gotcha.
Okay then, I’ll be waiting until you find the answer that makes you go “this is it!”
Actually, you’re free to show it to me on the day of the live show, even! As a surprise!
Ossu! I’m seriously indebted to you time and time again, Hinata-kun.
I’m gonna do my absolute best to show the “man among men” side of me once and for all!
Chapter 2
A few days later…
(Ack, this is bad… My time’s almost up, but I still haven’t thought up any good ideas~!)
Uu~myu… What am I gonna do—
—How many times will HiMERU have to hear that bizarre groan of yours?
Uwah!? I’m so sorry, HiMERU-san.
If I’m bein’ a bother, I’ll head on outside straight away…
Outside? It’s too late in the night to go out now.
Wait, what!? But Narukami-senpai still hasn’t come back…
Narukami-san mentioned this morning that her work will have her sleeping over at a hotel tonight.
Oh right, I think I remember her saying somethin’ like that…? Ahaha.
Well, your head has been in the clouds since the morning.
Narukami-san said she’ll wait to discuss it until you bring it up, but HiMERU is at his limit.
Nagumo, if something is on your mind, please talk to HiMERU about it. HiMERU will assist you.
…That’s surprising. I didn’t expect you to offer to listen to my troubles, HiMERU-san.
HiMERU won’t be able to sleep if you keep groaning all night. And it wouldn’t be right to drive you out of the room, either.
Urk… Well, that’s true.
But this time around, I wanna figure out the right answer all on my own, so…
You haven’t progressed at all by doing so, have you?
HiMERU believes that it’s pointless to keep wasting time without having found a solution.
Guh—… You keep cuttin’ deep into my heart, HiMERU-san…
HiMERU will not force you, but he believes that you need to understand that you no longer have the luxury to say something like that.
…You’re exactly right, HiMERU-san. My time’s almost up, yet I still haven’t finalized a single idea.
I’m just bein’ stubborn at this point. And that’d only cause trouble to Anzu-anego, wouldn’t it?
Aight, I give in… HiMERU-san, couldja hear me out a li’l, please?
Time passes…
—Hm. HiMERU understands in full detail now.
So you say you’re unable to decide how to approach your Feature Live?
When Anego was making my personalized outfit, I asked for somethin’ a bit mature, somethin’ that looks a li’l too big on me.
I went with that ‘cuz I wanted it to be an embodiment of my feelings of wanting to put effort into growing stronger, and wanting to grow ‘til I become a version of myself that matches the outfit.
That’s still how I feel to this day. I wanna show my fans who I am as I continue to work hard and grow even more.
But… I feel like I can’t say I’ve grown if my answer is the exact same as before…
—And what’s wrong with keeping it that way?
Huh? Are you seriously saying that…!?
In fact, you should express that answer as thoroughly as possible. Especially if that’s truly what you would say is your ideal.
Express it as thoroughly as possible…? But how?
There is no need to overthink it. You simply need to show yourself as you are.
You do your best to move forward, even if it takes all your strength to do so. You expend all your energy and efforts in order to attain your ideal.
That is the cool version of yourself that you’d like to show your fans, yes?
—Then, instead of pushing yourself to fit a bigger outfit, all you need to do is captivate your fans with your authentic self.
On top of that, you will have candid photos taken of yourself for the Feature Live’s pamphlet.
Thus, wouldn’t this approach coincide with the concept of the project?
Huh, I see. I didn’t think of that before, actually…
I’m letting you know now: do not think for a second that you would simply be relying on HiMERU’s idea here.
If you weren’t someone with great ambition to improve yourself, HiMERU wouldn’t suggest such an idea, either.
…Does that mean this is how you think of me, HiMERU-san?
While it’s only been for a short while so far, we do share the same room.
HiMERU has caught glimpses of you working hard day after day whether he likes it or not.
Whether you like it or not…? You’re wording it in a strange way again…
You sometimes exercise with a hand grip underneath your futon, no?
You may not know this, but HiMERU can clearly hear the clicking sound. Were you not aware of this?
A-Ahaha… I’ll be more careful from now on.
HiMERU doesn’t mind. You are always improving yourself as an idol, Nagumo. HiMERU also holds a great impression towards such an attitude.
Right, it is time HiMERU sleeps. You mustn’t overdo it either, Nagumo.
Gotcha! Thank you so much for hearing me out!
(Presenting myself as I am… as my authentic self, huh?)
Okay! I’ll compile my ideas and message Anego straight away!
Ah! Heeey, over here! Anzu-anego! You showed up~! (waves)
Please wait a moment! I’ll come to you straight away!
Huff… Huff… Sorry to keep ya waitin’, Anego. I apologize for calling you over so early in the morning.
…I’m sorry, Anego. Could I drink a li’l bit of water first?
Thank you. I got so thirsty after running as hard as I can so early in the morning…
Whew~… I feel alive again! Cold water always feels great~!
Ahaha. I was in a good mood, so I put my all in my morning training!
Have you been keeping yourself hydrated too, Anego?
Please feel free to drink water if you’re feelin’ thirsty.
I’m feelin’ hydrated enough, so I’m back to full energy! I can run a few more laps now!
Oh, wait. Before I go for a run, I should tell you why I called for you here.
Did I decide what sorta live show I want? Ahaha, you can see right through me no matter what, huh?
For my Feature Live, I wanna captivate my fans by showing ‘em myself as I am.
I’m always doin’ my absolute best in order to become a man among men.
So for the pamphlet, I wanna focus on how I look whenever I’m doin’ my daily efforts to better myself.
Personally, I think that someone who pours all their effort into somethin’ is really cool.
That’s why I want my fans to think the same while seein’ me work hard.
Actually… I wanna become an idol that makes all my fans think of me that way.
That’s the sorta idea I’ve come up with, but… Is it okay?
“Then let’s start taking photos immediately” — Wait, you’ve already got your camera with you, Anego!?
I called you here early in the morning ‘cuz I wanted to share with you my vision for the pamphlet, but I wasn’t planning on doin’ the photoshoot just yet.
Then again, going ‘bout it in an unexpected way should get us a better photo of my usual self~♪
Aight, I gotcha! It’s time to show what it means to be a man! Becomin’ a man among men’s still a distant dream for me, after all~
But you know, talking to you on the running grounds reminds me of the Sports Festival a li’l.2
That really takes me back~ I still remember when we did the three-legged race together.
Hehe! How about you and I go for a run together like we did back then, Anego?
Ahaha, I’m just joking. I meant it more like a metaphor.
Anzu-anego… I’m still far from my ideal self.
I still don’t feel like I’ve become great enough to confidently say that I’m a man among men.
That’s exactly why, ‘til the day I build that confidence… I’m gonna keep working to the best of my ability.
I just wanted to ask you to keep watching over me as much as you can, while I try to reach my ideal.
“I’ve always been watching over you”…? Haha, you’re so reassuring, Anego~ Thank you so much, really.
Aight then, Anzu-anego. I’m all yours for the photoshooting, we can start anytime!
Tetora Feature Scout Stories
Ryuseitai 5* Feature Scout Stories
Translation Notes
- ↑ Referring to Tetora's first Feature Scout story, Some Day, On The Path To My Ideal.
- ↑ Referring to Sports Festival.